When Self Sabotage Shows Up Unannounced
This post will explain why our brains create drama out of new levels and why safety feels out of reach when we level up.
“Self sabotage often shows up when achieving new levels of growth & success, at what seems like the most unforeseeable times. ”
What we tend to do, is make this a problem OR
We internalize the problem, add a layer of shame on top and make ourselves THE problem (not the problem itself).
Now we have the problem AND another shame layer to add to our messy baggage pile.
Lucky us, right?
What if this isn’t a problem but just part of what happens when reaching:
New levels?
New love?
New success?
New financial goals?
It’s just new and foreign to your brain.
Your brain is scanning for safety and simply warning you of danger.
It’s risky to try new things, yet once you create safety, you reap the rewards of that ‘perceived danger.’
We’ve thought that a magical safety will come WHEN you reach the goal, marry your husband, hit a PR, or surpass a financial goal, but does it?
No, you just bring those same thoughts with you.
And, you still feel unsafe.
Internal safety has to happen, first with your thoughts, and be carried with you on the way to reaching those goals.
Or else you’ll get there, thinking you ‘outran the issue’ but instead just take it with you.
And, if it’s not addressed, you’ll go after something even bigger, thinking that THIS time, it will be different.
Safety in reaching a new level, new love, new success, and new financial goal happens when you decide ahead of time, and then learn ways to acknowledge & manage your thoughts that will then help create safety while going after ‘unsafe’ goals.
This is the work we’ll do together.
Create safety and then STYLE your Sustainable Success.
Healing self sabotaging behaviors
ABOUT THE AUTHOR I’m Meg Smithson and I remember vividly the heartache, distress, and agony that self sabotaging behaviors caused me. Between eating disorders, anxiety, major self doubt, and constant imbalance, I couldn’t seem to live the fulfilling life I imagined.
If you are currently dealing with this, I get it & know exactly how you feel.
I spent a decade of heartache striving to fit the elusive mold of what mainstream considered “perfect” all while trying to figure out why I was put on this earth.
I learned to listen to what I needed…
…not what others expected of me. Gradually, I felt freedom like I had never imagined I could.
What does a relationship coach do?
Now, I teach women to find that freedom, too, by helping them create the relationship that they really want, faster by first healing their attachment to shame, people pleasing, & perfectionism.
Click to schedule a free consult!
Meg Smithson, Life Coach
Meg coaches women by identifying areas of self sabotage, helping them break up with the shame that usually accompanies that, and then shows them how to set boundaries around the emerging 2.0 version they want to become, and live that life, unapologetically.
Click to schedule a life coaching consultation with Meg.
